Dinosaur Flatulence Caused Global Warming: Stupid Conservative Joke to Brilliant Liberal Science

Back in 2007, Dana Rorhbacher (R-CA) caught a bunch of flak from the left when he joked about dinosaur farts being a cause for global warming. Some over zealous leftists even made a video to make fun of Rorhbacher’s obvious joke. They present evidence that suggests that there is no way dinosaur farts could account for “all emissions responsible for past warming cycles.”

FireDogLake couldn’t resist taking a swipe at Rorhbacher.
“Now, I know it was probably some sort of smart-assed retort to protect whatever pollution-friendly interests were funding whatever was making Rohrbacher happy in the moment but…hello?!? Yes, I’m certain that we can all stop for a moment in our day to pause and reflect on how dinosaur farts could, indeed, be the cause of a mass, global extinction. Now THAT is some powerful tooting, if you ask me.”

Think Progress also posted the FireDogLake Article on their site.

Oh but it could be true. Current Biology journal published the findings of a “scientific” study that was conducted by David Wilkinson of Liverpool John Moores University and Graeme Ruxton of the University of St. Andrews.

Wilkinson and Ruxton worked in conjunction with methane expert Euan Nisbet at the University of London to “make an educated guess about the degree to which gaseous emissions from sauropods could have warmed the atmosphere.” [Reuters; It’s a gas: dinosaur flatulence may have warmed the Earth.]

These guys came up with a mathematical formula to determine how much methane gas may have been emitted by sauropod dinosaurs. “A simple mathematical model suggests that the microbes living in sauropod dinosaurs may have produced enough methane to have an important effect on the Mesozoic climate,” said researcher Dave Wilkinson.

Here’s the neato graph they created;

So what’s the end game here? Seems to me that this is the starting gun to commence an assault on methane emissions.  Australia has already placed a carbon-credit bounty on its ferral camel population.  And here in the US, they’d just love to start taxing livestock, and any other animal whose flatulence may pose a supposed threat to our environment.

Keep your hemp-mittened hands off of our cows!

Here are a few tweets from “reputable” sources about the dino-farts-may-have-caused-prehistoric-warming revelation;

BBC News UK

Discovery News

The Huffington Post is buying it…

Live Science

Gizmodo

TreeHugger.com

I reached out (via twitter of course) to the biggest global warming true believer on the planet. No not Al Gore silly, I’m talking about Jose Canseco.

I have yet to receive a response. If I do, I’m sure that it will be just as intelligent and coherent as his previous statements about global warming.

Silver Spoons Episode 101: Guess Who Had a Zoo

I never had any interest in reading either of Obama’s memoirs, but that changed when I read Jim Treacher’s Daily Caller piece, “Obama Bites Dog“.

Turns out none of the left-wing media sycophants ever bothered to read Obama’s book, “Dreams From My Father”, or surely they would have engaged in preemptive damage control.

Unwilling to pay for a copy of Obama’s book, since he’s already stolen enough money from me via taxation, I checked my library’s overdrive offerings.  Low and behold, both e-book copies of ‘Dreams’ were available, click to download, and I was off!

I had rather low expectations of the writing abilities of our “smartest president evah” considering his propensity to stumble over common words (see: corpsman and un-intellected)  I was pleasantly surprised to find the prose are quite beautiful.  It’s a quick read, and I thought about holding off on posting my findings until I had completed the book, but the stuff I’ve found so far is just too good to hold back.

Only 44 pages into ‘Dreams’, I came upon this:

So Obama not only had a pet ape named Tata, he had his own zoo! I’ll eat my flip-flop if you can find me one American kid who wouldn’t want to have their own zoo.  Quick, somebody ask born-with-silver-spoon-in-mouth Mitt Romney if he ever had his own zoo!

Silver Spoons Starring the Obamas

Maybe Obama wasn’t born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but he has spent the last three years luxuriating on our dime.

For the sake of fairness I decided to re-cut the opening credits of the 80’s sitcom ‘Silver Spoons’, and make the Obamas the stars.

Selective Outrage: Rock the Slut Vote Edition

Rush Limbaugh has been lambasted for referring to Sandra Fluke as a ‘slut’.   The use of this word enraged feminists (read the liberal left) and birthed the still unsubstantiated, “GOP war on women”.

While poking around on some democrat sites yesterday I came upon what I first took to be a ruse, a prank, perpetrated by The Onion perhaps.   But oh no my dear readers, I assure you that this very real.

I give you: ROCK THE SLUT VOTE

Check it out y’all there is even a facebook group which as of today, has been liked by, what I presume to be 854 “sluts”.

And have no fear the Rock the Slut Vote twitter account is here!

If you would like to weigh in on what the Rock the Slut Vote theme song should be, better respond to this tweet before your vote goes uncounted….

Are all of you formerly angry women now happy to wrap your arms around such an insulting term?  Is this some attempt to ‘take back the night slut’?

I see you’re also selling t-shirts.  Are you profiting off of the term now too?  If so I think you may owe Mr. Limbaugh some royalties or at the very least a thank you note.  Good luck sluts ladies!

Oh and just in case there was any doubt about which party the Rock the Slut Vote contingent backs, this map, from their site should clear up any confusion.

The Party of Hate

angry-obamaThis past summer, Democrat politicians and their talking-point armed pundits, delighted in dubbing the GOP “The Party of NO”.  Had they succeeded in passing universal health care they most certainly would have broken their arms patting themselves on the back for that one, and oh how clever they were!  What a zinger! “The Party of NO”, boy does that sting!  While I’m still smarting, I think I’ll heed our dear leader’s advice and ‘punch back twice as hard’;

Dear Democrat Party, I dub thee “The Party of Hate”.

angry-biden

What’s that you’re shouting?

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“NO”!

rep-nancy-pelosi

Excuse me that’s our mantra remember?  I will extend to you the courtesy of explaining why I chose this moniker for you as surely you’re having trouble comprehending my word choice.  It’s quite simple you see, The Democrat Party perpetually preaches hatred.  The party demonizes big business from oil to insurance.  It claims we must abhor the rich, profits and SUVs and it fervently attacks individuals, Bush, Rove, Thomas, Scalia, Palin, Bachmann, Limbaugh, Levin, Hannity, Rumsfeld and let’s not forget the man that has ‘blood that drips from his teeth’, the devil himself, Dick Cheney.

This tangled mass of hatred was born from one simple seed, the hatred of free market capitalism.  It is a system in which those who trade only in the monetarily worthless commodity that is emotion can not thrive let alone survive.  Since proper function within the boundaries of this system is a practical impossibility for these hate peddlers, they persistently strive for it’s destruction.  Although hate has no value, it can be an extremely powerful weapon when wielded by reckless hands.  But have no fear my fellow “Party of No” friends, we can disarm them by simply saying “no” to what they’re selling.

Dancing with the Stars and Stripes

ballroom_dancing

Like a true lady, America has been generous with her dance card.  She has allowed 43 different men to escort her onto the floor, one of them on two separate occasions.  Each man has been strikingly different from the next.  They have varied in age, religion, race, ethnicity, education, social status and philosophy.
Some have guided her with skill and grace.  Twirling her elegantly in time with the music, encouraging her proudly to display the breadth of her beauty.  They have allowed her to absorb the spotlight while following her lead.
Others have not been such selfless partners. There are those who have stepped on her toes because they’ve chosen to dance to a different beat than the one she is hearing.   A few have even spiked her punch and attempted to convince her to relinquish her values in exchange for theirs.
She never abandons any of these gentlemen before the music has stopped.   She always makes good on the contract of her dance card.  At times she’s basked in the warmth of the spotlight.  But she has also known the frigid depths of the shadow cast by a partner’s ego.  All the while she has kept her head held high and her principles close.  She has remained dignified, humble and open to dancing with whomever she is paired.
She currently finds herself in the arms of a man who wishes to guide her across the floor in a manner with which she is completely unfamiliar.  To her this dance is completely foreign and seems to be leading in an uncharted direction.  She is finding it increasingly more difficult to will her feet to comply with these new steps.  The result is two dancers spinning quite clumsily and entirely haphazardly across the floor.
America is tripping over the feet of a man who wants her to follow his lead, to conform to his chosen rhythm.  He cares little about the proper execution of the predetermined choreography; he has brought his own drummer.
There are some who are in awe of the brazen manner of America’s latest dance partner.  His approach is new and different.  His arrogant steps are sloppy and have fallen out of time with the music., but they happily overlook the quality of his performance, because they love his style.
Other audience members are staring in wide-eyed disbelief as America, their consummate favorite and reigning champion is being made to look like an amateur.  They pray that she can last the length of this song.  Can she maintain her dignity when she is being made to look like such a fool?  Can she recover after so many missteps?  Will she live to dance another day?
If she holds true to what she knows to be right, she can regain control of the pace.  She can finish strong and smiling and will retain her standing in the world.  But if she chooses to acquiesce to her partner’s will, her bright star will be extinguished forever.
The outcome will be decided by a two-judge panel presided over by Time and History.  These two may have the final say as to her fate, but their decision is highly susceptible to public opinion.  Now is not a time for shyness, applaud if you like the show you’re watching or boo if you’re unimpressed, believe me the judges are all ears.

Cap and Trade? More like Slap and Rape

capspend1

“That’s right I said it!” ~ Mark Levin

You may be thinking, wow that’s some harsh language you’ve chosen and that it may be, but it is a far superior explanation of what the so-called Cap and Trade legislation really does.  The choice of such innocuous language, Cap-and-Trade, is in no way accidental.  It is an integral part of disguising the dangerous repercussions which will certainly ensue if this agenda is adopted by the United States.

I refuse to allow this manipulation of language to mask the reality of the situation which is this; Cap and Trade amounts to slapping a fine on harmless carbon emissions, raping industries of their profits and it will lead to the eventual destruction of all industrial nations.

This agenda which the Obama Administration supports, is being pushed by the ‘green’ environmental movement and is tantamount to a toxin which will infect and kill American industry at the same time placing a heavy burden upon all American taxpayers and consumers.  When taxes are levied against businesses the costs of those taxes are inevitably passed on to the consumer.  The price of goods and services will increase to compensate for the revenues lost due to the taxation.  I implore you, please do not be lulled into complacency by President Obama’s empty promise of tax cuts for “95% of working Americans”.  The Commander in Chief himself has admitted, ever so quietly that energy bills will necessarily skyrocket for everyone should this legislation be enacted.

Now, I’d like to address the alleged consensus of Global Warming/Climate Change.  Regardless of what ideologues like Al Gore would like you to believe, THERE IS NO CONSENSUS ON GLOBAL WARMING SCIENCE!  Every year an increasing number of scientists are challenging the findings of the IPCC (The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change).  There is a petition being circulated with the signatures of over 31,000 scientists to date, which urges the United States government to reject the Kyoto Agreement.  It also points out that there is no convincing evidence that the human release of carbon dioxide, methane or other greenhouse gases are or will cause a disruption of Earth’s climate.  For reasons unknown these factual assertions of these scientists continue to go unreported while the alarmists environmentalists are heralded and never questioned regarding the merits of their garbage science.

For over two decades environmentalists have been pushing their agenda.  They brazenly wield the sword of fear to accomplish their goals.  They insight undue panic with their outlandish claims and are never held to account when their junk science falls apart.  Case in point:  In the fourth grade (1987) I was taught that a hole had appeared in the ozone layer.  This hole was a result of Chlorofluorocarbons or CFCs.  These evil little molecules were being released into the atmosphere via aerosols.  I remember pleading with my grandmother to discontinue her use of Aquanet hairspray because it was destroying our planet.  As a nine-year-old the environmentalists had me convinced that humans, although infinitesimally small in comparison to the earth, had the ability to influence and manipulate its atmosphere.

Environmentalists effectively lobbied for the banning of CFC’s.  The ban came into effect with the signing of the Copenhagen Protocol of 1992.  Now I ask you to think about the last time you heard mention of the hole in the ozone.  My guess is it’s been at least a decade, and why is that?  Has the hole closed up because those vicious CFCs are no longer invading the atmosphere?  Nope, the hole is still there although the nomenclature has been changed.  It is no longer called a hole but rather according to NASA,  it is a ‘region of exceptionally depleted ozone in the stratosphere.’

So if the hole or ‘exceptionally depleted ozone in the stratosphere’ still exists why aren’t the environmentalists talking about it?  I can only assume that it has stopped being profitable for them.  The research grants have dried up, and even though the hole or whatever you choose to call it, persists to this day it is no longer a concern of theirs.  Now as a twenty nine-year-old I stand completely convinced that they have no idea what they are talking about.  I simply refuse to allow them to sucker me into believing their science or their altruistically cloaked motives.  They have moved on to the much more profitable agenda of Global Warming/Climate Change (hundreds of billions are spent on Global warming research grants each year).

**UPDATE Since 2009, when this piece was originally published, NASA has added a page to its site OZONE HOLE WATCH it has all kinds of nifty data that tracks the size of the hole that still remains in the ozone today.  I especially enjoyed this graph which clearly shows the size of the hole has remained relatively the same for the last thirty years. **

Their target this time is CO2 which they claim is a dangerous green house gas chiefly responsible for Global Warming.  They blatantly ignore the inescapable fact that human beings and animals exhale CO2 and plants in essence inhale CO2.  They also choose to overlook the fact that huge amounts of CO2 are produced by the Earth’s oceans and volcanoes.

According to the alarmist environmentalists actions need to be taken immediately to curb the 2% of greenhouse gases created by human beings.  According to their data this 2% comes from coal burning powerplants, cars, airplanes and buildings.  They have chosen to keep relatively quiet about the 18% of greenhouse gases created by livestock flatulence.  This was brought to light recently however when cow flatulence tax legislation was proposed in both Ireland and Denmark (€13 per cow in Ireland and €80 in Denmark). 

**UPDATE The link to that the story about taxing flatulence, originally published in The Times UK, is no longer working.  I could not find another credible source to link to, but what I did find is an article published in 2010 about the EPA’s desire to tax US livestock owners.**

The reason for their silence in this regard is unmistakably obvious, no one in their right mind would ever believe that cow farts should be treated as a pollutant no matter how noxious they may be.

The environmentalists who are trying to slap a tax on cow farts are the same ones screaming that Cap and Trade legislation must be passed!  These people are deaf, dumb and blind when it comes to true scientific research about Global Warming/Climate Change.  The Earth has always gone through cooling periods and warming periods and will continue to do so as long as it exists.  They seem to at least recognize this to the extent that they have changed their language once again, Global Warming is now slowly morphing into Climate Change.  Calling it Global Warming only made sense when temperatures were rising, but since 2003 global temperatures have been declining.  Instead of admitting their lack of indisputable scientific evidence, they simply change the name to something that can never be called into question; Climate Change, which encompasses all possible temperature shifts.

This language is simply preposterous.  Climate or temperature if you prefer, is constantly changing, it did so before the first human graced the face of the Earth and will continue to do so until the Earth ceases to exists.  Yes it’s true, the Earth does have a finite life-span, but we humans will have nothing to do with its demise.  You see the Sun’s gravitational force is ever so slowly pulling all of the planets toward it.  The closer the Earth’s orbit gets to the sun, the hotter the Earth will become and eventually the Earth will be swallowed up by the sun.  There is nothing that can stop this from happening.

We can not allow the propaganda of the radical environmental movement to corrupt the logic and facts of the situation.  We must pick apart their phony claim that CO2 emissions must be taxed because they are destroying our planet.  We must point out that if CO2 is as detrimental as the environmentalists would like us to believe, then they would be calling for an outright ban on CO2 emissions.  They would not seek monetary compensation as an acceptable trade-off for that which they deem poison being released into the atmosphere.  Their goal in reality has nothing to do with the environment but everything to do with the halting of human progress.

They wish to kill all industry and advancement.  Their ideal world is one with no livestock, no cars, no buildings and no factories.  They believe the caveman to be more in tune with the Earth and therefore superior to the modern industrialist.  They have set out to force modern man back into the caves, and Cap-and-Trade shall be their greatest victory in this battle.  A victory we must never allow them to achieve.